Many moons ago, ''twas discovered by a gimpy biker (known by his close friends as Crazy Rob), that if one found it necessary, one could melt the snow from the roads in a matter of hours........... even in the dead frost of winter. Now this is no easy task, like all ancient methods of sorcery, alchemy and black magic, it was necessary to commit an act so heinous, so vile, only a biker could be called upon. So it is needed, for the melting of the snow, a good rogering of a young ladies hindquarters. In this case of course, it was good that it took a scary bikey sort, as that's who is in the most need of having snowless streets. So, to get to the subject at hand here, our dear friend Pavement (who's glossy black bastard child of a streetfighter you in this here

spread), whom was called upon to perform the task of melting the snow offa the streets so that he and all of his bikey friends could ride through the cold months without fear of the the white fluffy flakes. Being the fine young bastard he is, Pavement immediately took to the streets and cafes and night clubs and such, searching for young ladies who would be willing to have their bottoms violated in the name of roadways clear and free of snow. So it came to be that the youthful and virile(virii?) Pavement shtoinked the tender arses of all of the girlies he could get his frothy mitts on, and the snow was melted from our streets. In a strange twist of reality (those are known to happen on a regular basis around here) Pavement has been known to ride like he's the one getting chased down to be buggered. He can take just about any corner, s-turn, hill. alleyway, straightway, dirt road or stretch of lawn and fearlessly crash into a thousand little bitty pieces, hence is namesake. This is probably a good thing, cause otherwise he'd be known as Captain Cornhole, and that nickname has been reserved for someone who truly deserves it. Pave has had many a nasty crash,

everything from rear-ending a Volxwagen to folding a FZR 600 to resemble a taco shell. He's also made many a unexpected dismount on random occasions. He never seems to get hurt real bad, even if he did his medical insurance won't give him much more than a band-aid, a couple of tylenol and a swift footie out the door. He has seen quite his fair share of the road, albeit a bit sideways. Some seasons he even racked up more miles on the side of the bike rather than on the wheels. This all leads us to modern day of course, to a city of snowless streeted winters, a man with well chafed loins, an incredibly beasty GPz streetfighter Zed, and dozens of sweet girlies wif bruised bungholes. I asked Pavement for a bit of a statement on his history with his ride:

"Pandora has under gone several different stages of being in my possession, and at least one other form her stock form while owned by others. I bought her as a re-streeted club endurance race bike, with pipe, jets, tarozzi rear sets, and smog equipment removed, and a slew of problems...she blew up with in a day of ownership, destroying the timing chain, transmission from the crank back, a con rod, and bending a few valves. Her motor was rebuilt from the ground up by Steels Salvage I rode her in that form for a few months before other things began to go wrong. As I fixed every nagging leak, every irritating short, every disintegrated throw out bearing, every rust spot, she slowly metamorphosed into the street fighter she is today. Necessity may be the mother of invention, but addiction is the mother of the street fighter"

And that's the scoop on a man, his machine, and his sexual hobbies......which just happen to be illegal in 38 out of 50 states. Pavement is a long standing Member of the U.T.M.C., generally a stand up sort of guy (as long as you don't pay attention to all the buggering) and you can generally find him yakking on the U.T.M.C. message board. A'ight.. here's the jaw waggin for all you folx out there that read the techie bits:

Name: Pandora Year: 1983 Make: Kawasaki Model: zx-750-a1, GPz

Emissions: pressure equalization hose fitted to heads. Fuel System and Pipe: stage three jet kit, k+n individual pod filters, Yoshimura 4>1 super sport exhaust (restored, hand painted and polished) Stuff that makes it go like the blazes simply b'cause its there: blue Taylor performance wires, k+n crank breather mounted with a length of pre-shaped fzr radiator hose, modified clutch release bearing assembly (the stock one kept disintegrating), raask rear set controls set for down for up shift pattern, inverted swing arm eccentric for forward weight bias, fully adjustable clip ons, mounted below the top triple clamp, modified wiring harness with quick connectors for all lighting, dp brake pads front and rear, steel braided line from master cylinder to split, Bits Yanked: front fairing assembly removed, air box removed, California smoggy box and can yanked, shock gaiter removed, Straight up funky cosmetic stuffe': vertically stacked staggered rally lights mounted in custom bracket as new head assembly (bracket made from hand cut 4mm aluminum construction sign, pop rivets, and a but mounting bracket for a 2x4) after market bar mounted mirrors. Short stalk aluminum front marker lights, frame mounted with hand made aluminum brackets (the construction sign again). Fender removed, FZR lower fairing stay brackets used to mount license plate. Rear markers and tail light integrated into tail cone (flush mount I markers, flush mount III for tail light with red painted lens) Reinforced fuel tank <stops it from tearing at the rear buckle - Craig Sherwood: 303-934-0915 Gloss black paint job - Jim Thomsen: 303-435-4774 Motor rebuild - Steel's Salvage: 303-781-5339